The New Year isn’t all about developing new habits but it can be about changing old ones. During this and the final two parts of the Sex Solutions instalment, I will be showing you some very different ways you can spice up your sex life as well as your relationship. We’ve already been practical in part one. Now let’s have some fun!
Love yourself!
Your guide to solo sex
Whether you are single, married, engaged, straight, bisexual, or just plain curious there is definitely something to be said about a woman’s touch. You may have thought about this, experimented with it outside of the confines of your own bedroom…maybe in the freedom of someone else’s! You might know the intricacies of your favourite feminine toys such as the rabbit or egg vibrators and, as ladylike as we try to be, there is no denying we all love a bit of ‘me’ time. However, what you may not realise yet is that you have potentially the most talented pair of hands you will ever need behind closed doors. Want me to prove it? Here’s how with my ‘handy’ five steps to heaven:
Step One: Set the Mood.
Think back to every erotic moment you have ever been party to. Be as demanding to yourself as you are to your man. Set the mood. Wait for everyone to go out. Shut off the phone, switch off the television, maybe take a bath or shower and preen a bit. Treat yourself as if you were gearing up for a hot date. Put on some light music, maybe a glass of wine to switch off, lie back and enjoy. You might be surprised what this extra bit of preparation can do for your libido so if you haven’t already, try leading up in this way.
Step Two: Testing the waters
Shower time can be more fun than you’d think and the effects of a splash of warm water on the clitoris more arousing than not. Try gently touching the area around your clitoris between your labia while bathing. Don’t penetrate, just tease. Gently tap a finger against your clitoris and tickle the inner folds of your labia as you bathe. Increase the speed as you go but still, tempted as you may be, don’t penetrate and don’t pay any further attention to your clitoris until you’re in a position to explore yourself fully. Continue until you feel the urge to press on…then do wait a further thirty seconds. Then go on.
Step Three: Experimenting with techniques
Clitoral stimulation is a great way to chase that elusive female orgasm for those of us who have trouble. If you haven’t experienced a clitoral orgasm or more intense stimulation from this area, it might be time to mix it up. Not every girl will achieve climax from this type of stimulation alone but not all may be making the best of this invaluable part of her anatomy:
- Try using your first three fingers: Spread your labia with the outer two while using your middle finger to stroke your clitoris. Push your hips up and tighten your buttocks. Depending on comfort, you can sit up with a pillow behind you and rock your hips to meet your fingers or try this position on your back, lying on your bed.
- Roll your clitoris between your thumb and forefinger: to get a better idea of how to perform this technique, take a penny between these two digits and rub it softly. Depending on the size of your clitoris this may be challenging however, master this one and you won’t be able to keep still!
- A B C: holding your labia apart, trace the letters of the alphabet across your clitoris. Increase or decrease the pressure as you become more aroused, depending on your preferences. Another popular and similar technique is tracing a figure eight across your clitoral area.
- Bullet Vibes: placing a vibrating bullet against your clitoris can have marvellous affects. Always try on the lowest settings first to gage your sensitivity.
Step Four: Finding your G-spot
If you haven’t done so already, experimenting with G-spot orgasm is a rather marvellous endeavour for the horny woman. Yet, the tragedy of the G-spot is that it is sadly underused. Owing to the variation of each woman’s anatomy, the G-spot can be an elusive creature. Nevertheless, here is a simple guide to hitting your button!
Method one: the old fashioned way!
The G-spot is generally located on the upper wall of your vagina, one knuckles depth in. This is located towards the front rather than the back of your vagina. Use your favourite lubricant to maximise comfort and slide your index finger inwards and feel around for a soft, spongy, slightly ridged texture. This is your G-spot. To stimulate it crook your finger and stroke towards your palm. G-spot stimulation is usually best used in conjunction with clitoral stimulation.
Method two: Using a helper!
If you are having trouble reaching your G-spot or the stroking method isn’t for you, you can enlist the help of a G-spot orientated rabbit like this one: http://www.rampantrabbitheaven.co.uk/gspot/oh-gspot-rabbit-vibrator. G-spot rabbits will usually be curved inwards, much as your finger would be in method one and are designed for this purpose. Not only is this generally easier on the wrist but you can get firmer clitoral stimulation at the same time.
Not all girls will achieve G-spot orgasms in the same way that not all will achieve clitoral orgasms. However, experimenting with your G-spot is well worthy of trial and error simply because either way, the G-spot can heighten your arousal and increase the quality of your playtime.
Method Five: Vibrators
And finally, invest in a vibrator if you haven’t already! There are several types of toys
available depending on your needs:
The Bullet Vibe: A bullet vibrator can be inserted into your vagina while you stimulate your clitoris. Similarly, the bullet can be held against your clitoris while you stimulate inside. Here is an example of this type of toy: http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=22122
The Rabbit: Rabbits penetrate and massage the clitoris simultaneously. These are the reason Charlotte wouldn’t leave her room in Sex and the City and the reason you probably won’t either: http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=22189 (and of course there are plenty to see on our main site here).
G-spot Vibes: we’ve already seen one example of these. Here is another: http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=14134 these somewhat scary looking beasts are actually very kind to your G-spot in more ways than one. This particular lovely is great for women with deeper g-spots and these are well worth looking at if you’re curious about g-spot stimulation and play in general.
Finally…experiment!
Playing with any of these techniques and toys is sure to get you to that elusive ‘O’. If a woman keeps many secrets in her heart, she certainly keeps a whole lot more down below! Your body is capable of more than you realise. Don’t be afraid to experiment and let your significant other know about any quirks and kinks you discover as, overall, masturbation can actually improve your love life as well as relieve stress. \
Next Week: New Year’s Sex Solutions Parts Three and Four. How to think kink and how to beat the seven year itch. Keep things fresh and check back soon!
Other parts:
New Years Sex Solutions Part 1 – Single & Looking: Finding and keeping your ideal guy
New Years Sex Solutions Part 2 – Your Guide to Solo Sex
New Years Sex Solutions Part 3 – The myth of the seven year itch and its impact on long term relationships has been hotly debated over the internet for the past few years. But is it a myth? The love of your life is far less easy to find than to loose, so why not try these simple steps to keeping tight hold!
New Years Sex Solutions Part 4: – Think Kink: If you’re looking to branch out into kinkier territories, here is your guide to broaching the subject with your partner and how to practice safe, consensual kink.
Credits:
Candle Photo by Rach, & Bath Photo by Sokoban
Tagged with: guide to solo sex • sex solutuons
Filed under: Guides • Sex Tips
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